Monthly Archives: December 2017

The dark side of EQ

(Originally posted 02/08/14.)

Adam Grant, The Dark Side of Emotional Intelligence
Daniel Goleman, An Antidote to the Dark Side of Emotional Intelligence

Dilemma:  a hammer can be used either to build a house or to destroy priceless heirlooms.  Possessing the tool of emotional intelligence does not mean one will use it favorably.  What makes the difference?

In anticipating this post, I searched for a traditional term for “emotional intelligence.”  I decided that the traditional term for it is wisdom. The Old Testament consistently refers to people who have emotional intelligence as “wise.”  Those who lack it, it calls “fools.”

In the previous post, we saw that emotional intelligence, or wisdom, is a major determinant of personal effectiveness and success in life; in short, of prosperity.  To the extent one wishes all people to prosper, it seems desirable that all people be wise.

In short, the wise prosper.

But the wise aren’t necessarily good, and the good aren’t necessarily wise.
Continue reading The dark side of EQ

Ulterior motives are funny.

One’s ulterior motives can be wholly different from anything one would expect, and can make one do funny things — that one likewise would never expect.  At least, things that have nothing to do with one’s real needs.

Decades ago, my brother Francis, the dentist, knowing that my prescription medicines include SSRIs, asked whether I grit my teeth at night; for it’s common for such patients to do that.

I don’t grit my teeth, but I do take special joy in crunchy foods.  This has been on my mind, as this hankering has been prominent in recent months.  On occasions when I got turned away from the shelter, I would buy lots and lots of potato chips to include in supper, since they’re crunchy.  Also, potatoes are high in tryptophan, a precursor of serotonin; so that potatoes are, in fact, a mood-enhancing food. Continue reading Ulterior motives are funny.