a) Making babies

My parents committed to each other sexually FOR LIFE.  They married each other before either one made any babies.  My mother had four children, all by the same man — her husband.  My father had four children, all by the same woman — his wife.

It was the same way for everyone I knew.  This has a lot to do with why that neighborhood was the way it was.

All the evidence is clear about the advantages of the baby daddy being present in the home — for the material and emotional welfare of the children, boys and girls alike; and for the probability that the children themselves will prosper as adults.

It is key for the well-being of the mother as well.  How much drama do you want in life?  Dealing with one baby daddy, or with five?  Dealing with one baby mama, or with five?  Every one you add is that much more strife, confusion, difficulty and disadvantage.  Best to keep it only one.

Maybe your parents did different.  You can choose better than they did.

No one should ever stay in a situation of physical abuse.  If he ever puts his hands on you, leave.

Marriage takes work, hard work, even when it’s easy.  The traditional vows say, “for better or worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health.”  My neighbor Mrs. Coats stood by Mr. Coats for ten years while he was blind, incontinent and demented.  It was astonishing to watch.  Now, work, responsibility and sacrifice went out of style in the 1960’s, but without them, you’ll never get ahead.

Make no mistake.  I’m no prude.  I’ve had many, many partners.  Making babies is a completely different question.

Unless and until I’m married to the woman, I’m-a use a rubber.

Maybe two or three, depending what we do.